Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Referral Anniversary



Some of you unfamiliar with the adoption process are probably going "huh" right about now.

Let me explain.

Referral is the equivalent to the ultrasound in the adoption world. That first glimpse of the precious baby that you have fallen in love with. You know the one that makes you hold you hold your breath as your eyes fall fresh upon that little person that has captivated your heart.

We received our referral on June 26, 2006. We had waited over one year for this news. So, in pregnancy time......it would have been the gestation of an elephant. Shew.

Leading up to this day was a journey. I will tell you the young, naive, excited girl who walked her adoption agreement in to the Adoption agency in February 2005 was not the same girl who answered the phone in June 2006. She had been changed by the FAITHFUL hand of God. Our family was rocked to it's foundation in March of that year and there was a moment that we were not sure if we would be able to continue Tatumn's adoption.

I cannot tell you how my heart broke over the thought of not being able to hold my daughter. I loved her so very much already. Out family had already made room for her in our hearts and loved poured forth out of those places. The boys would constantly ask questions like " when the baby gets here she can she sit by me?" And "can I sit by the baby when we go to church?" "Will she know I am her brother?" "Will she love me?"

Sweet, innocent love from three little boys who trusted their parents from the very beginning that God had called us to go to China and adopt a baby girl. And in doing so, she would complete our family. They trusted that God spoke in into our lives. They allowed God to tender their hearts, calm their fears, and grow a love for a little girl that did not come form our own flesh and blood.

And what grew out of that year long wait was a fierce love.

So, when March happened it rocked us. I remember crying over the boys' broken hearts. We didn't tell them how dire the situation had actually become but they knew something was going on.

I will tell more of that story another day.

Because obviously, we were able to adopt Ms. Tatumn Hope. The princess did get to her meet her Prince Charming. Her Daddy.

So, Thursday will mark our 2 year Referral Anniversary. The call came from on my cell phone. And in a conversation that lasted less than 5 minutes we were introduced to

Chen Jun De. A Hunan baby born on October 24, 2005. We were told by the nannies that she was given her name as a blessing. It means a beautiful girl who will grow into a virtuous woman.

We found out that she was tiny, with very little hair.

That was it........ our introduction to our daughter.

We didn't get good pictures until the next day. Via, the UPS man. I scared him to death when I jumped out of my front door with my camera. When I explained why, he totally got all nervous that he was responsible for such important documents! He was in disbelief that he was carrying around my daughter all day!

As, I type this I really am supposed to be preparing for Bible Study in the morning. I am teaching a lesson that I have in my head but not organized. Somehow, I needed to do this first.As I was getting out a notebook to take down my notes, I came across my rough draft of our personal statement for our HomeStudy. This was one of the documents that went into our dossier. (Adoption lingo for paperwork that is sent to China)

As I read what that young girl (me) wrote 3 years ago, I smiled at her zest for life. Her complete abandonment to her family. Her family dynamics. She did not know that her own personal story would change and that the "idyllic" life would be only for a season.

I am so very thankful that her dream came true one hot day in China. That the baby that she wrote about loving already and promising to take care of in the same fashion as her biological children is now 2 1/2 years old. And not really a baby anymore. So, thankful that that girl fully trusted in God's Faithfulness and Provision and allowed Him to change paths. That He brought them a place of Victory.

That the young family came through the fire, stronger.

And now older. I was completely amazed that when I wrote that statement for our HomeStudy, Taylor was 11, Tanner 8, and Tucker was 5.

Tatumn Hope was not even born yet. Her little life was just beginning. But we loved her so much already. How can that be? Even now, I cannot put words to that particular feeling. Tears sting my eyes as I let myself go back to through those moments where God beckoned us to follow Him.

And we did.

Honestly, it is God's way of showing us through Tatumn's adoption what He has done through Jesus Christ. We are adopted through Christ, to be a child of God's. That the love that overflowed out of this family for a little baby girl, on the other side of the World, is minute compared to God's love for us.

Completely Amazing.

Stop and think about that for a while.
(I have a Bible Study lesson to write)

2 comments:

Sarah@Life in the Parsonage said...

Steph, you're making me cry on my vacation!! :) A good kinda crying!

"Fierce love" how true...what an amazing journey God has brought you on, and your sharing it reveals Him to others.

Happy Anniversary to you and your beautiful family!

Anonymous said...

Happy Referral Day!!! Your little one is beautiful!